I began this post writing about what it means to be a mother. What it means to have such a fierce love for your children that you would literally lay down your life for them. How a mother is the glue that holds the family together. Those things all hold true for me, but my post just wasn’t clicking. Instead, I want to write what I’ve been thinking about for the last few days, even before I thought about Mother’s Day.
This post is going to be Love Letters. Love Letters to my four children.
You are 29 years old now. I was 23 years old when you were born. I had no clue what I was doing when you came into the world. But I had Dr. Spock. By the time you reached one year old, that book was torn, tattered, and water stained from reading it over and over again. As a baby and throughout your childhood you were always so happy and full of energy. You still have same energy today, along with your positive attitude. You bring that joy with you wherever you go. Your energy is contagious, and people are drawn to you. You are strong, and you are loyal. I am proud of the man you have become.
You are 26 years old now. I’ve told you this before, but when I was pregnant for you, I was so concerned that I wouldn’t be a good mother to you. I was afraid that I wouldn’t have enough love in my heart to properly give to another child. One child took so much time and energy, I didn’t understand how I could possibly be the mother I wanted to be to you. I need not have worried. From the moment you were born, you had my heart, as well as everyone around you. You were a quiet, gentle child, and so innocent, and loving. And today, my heart aches with pride as I see you with your own children. You show the same gentleness that you had as a young boy to your own children. You are a wonderful father, and I am so very proud of you.
You are 22 years old now. How excited I was when I had that little girl. I had visions of bows, pink dresses, dolls…all things girly. It took about a minute for you to let me know that you had ideas of your own. The pink ribbons, bows, and dresses were replaced with your brother’s shorts, high top shoes and a ball. Always a ball. We nicknamed you Jumpin Jilly Bean because you were so full of life. You were a force to be reckoned with, and you still are. You are faced today with the challenge of a life time, and you are showing everyone around you what a hero looks like. I am so very proud of you
My precious bug. You are 19 now. I would have to say you were the happiest of all the kids, and the easiest. You never complained about anything. You were happy to be home, happy to be traveling to various sporting events. Just happy to be with us. You were always such a sweet child too. You have grown up to be such an independent and responsible young adult. You have such a good head on your shoulders. I know that whatever life’s challenges may present, you will handle it head on with grace and strength. I am so very proud of you.
There has been no greater gift to me, than that of you,my children. I have been blessed with the opportunity to be a part of your lives. To share in your successes, to share in your failures. To share in your happiness, and in your sadness. And to love unconditionally.